week22

This is week 22
since you walked away
fresh wounds agains
what was becoming a simple scar
became a flood of blood in my mind
this weekend
i went to the mt
as i started to feel the cold
the smell of damp wood
the mist around
i realized
im just were i begun
thinking about you
just running away from memories
just trying to hide my pain from people
just being a lovely doll
I was with the person i like
it was weird cuz he asked me something
i can not remember now
and to my response
"im just good pretending to be a doll"
he repplied "i know"
Arend at work just does not look at me
probably his feelings for me resume to hate
better having him hating me
than the previous situation
i know you are sick
i wish i could just pet you
until you get better
last weekend was weird
all this week has being weird
i need to feed
not to eat but to feed
im too weak
im always sleepy
i need to sleep a lot
leo said i need to feed
i need to learn how to feed as a vampire
because i have awaken
but i still cant take what i need
to keep my energy up
i planted the edelweiss seeds
i take dedicated care of them
so i can have an edelweiss in my hand
i had a dream
involving edelweiss flowers
i have 2 more new piercings
in each side of the hips
i got them on saturday
saturday was a random day
i feel like cooking something weird
but i dont cook to myself
and after this weekend i give up cooking for the person i like
i wish to just stare at the stars
the pain is comming back
the waves are crashing again in my shores
is just me again
its just me
thsi weekend i will just see kro
and isaac, becauise kro is having a crisis
and then ill sleep my pain away....
maybe that is why i feel the urge to pierce myself
to balance pain internally with pain externally
i have certain disgust for my own self
Fabio contacted me
he wants ME to forgive him
i dont know if i am wrong
but if someone abused you
you dont just forgive them
and reminded me
how miserable i am
i disgust myself now... again
im just where i was
so im just gonna ease myself tonight
as the ghost i am to you now
hidden under the scense
of a white flower
in the night
this is just week 22
i wonder how you are
love of my life?


Sabrina
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quote of the week
"Alguien te amo; algún día, alguien te amo por tus sonrisas, por tus palabras tan sinceras. Alguien te amo; algún día, por lo que fuiste, por lo que has sido, y por lo que ahora eres. Alguien te amo; algún día, por tu silueta al sol, por tu cabello al viento. Alguien te amo; algún día, con todos tus defectos, por todas tus virtudes. Alguien te amo; algún día, aunque dijo que no lo hacia, aunque quizá pronto lo olvide. Algún día...Alguien te amo...* BY Genious
Visita su blog... http://www.mygenius05.blogspot.com/

-SONG of the week

blind by lifehouse
I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it

I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like it was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

After all this war
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go