week 7

week 7 since you walked away

wasted

used

plastic

this is how i feel

i saw you

i was high

i desired to be with you

but i cant be near

without having the coldness in my chest

the choking feeling

the nausea

the goosebumps

the tears i always have to hide

the bursting wished

the words i have to swallow

the pain clinching in my stomach

every day

every night

memories of us

come to my mind

my week was fine i guess

no, im not gonna lie

work is hard

i dont really like printers

nightmares always come back

this time more than ever

because i feel dirty

disgusted

with myself

after comming down at mt.s

we went to mcDonalds

they msitaken the order

and gave us more food

it was funny]

because we were really broke

after that

i went to isaac house

got changed to be at the masquerade

red dress, tight corse and the choker you loved, ballerinas and laces

goth make up with buterflies on the sides

a funny fact is that isaac's sister likes me,

she is lesbian

not my type though

anyway

we went to acid with fa

he drank

isaac too

me? not so much

we went to fabios house

isaac was so drunk

he slept in the bathroom floor

i had as always insomnia

so i was not able to sleep

in the middle of my thoughts

fa started to touch me

i stoped him until he was too rude for me to handle

he grabed me hard

and did whatever he wanted to...

with me...

no, it was not with me

it was TO me...

i feel used

i feeel dirty

i feel loveless

i am disgusted with everything

i cant eat

this nausea dont let me be

dont leave me alone

does not let me breath

where are you?

i need you

where are you

we miss you

carito, she said some stuffs

about her birthday

she does not want me to go

invites me because of randall

i dont want to go

where people dont want me to be

but... i have too

otherwise i will end

like the hateful one to ran...

you will be there right?

so is going to be fabio....

is not complicated mty life the way it is?

do i need even more complications?

isaac and kro are helping me to get through this

maybe as you say

i do parasite in people

i rely on them too much

maybe i just need to get away

right now thi is what i want

get away from people

so no one

can ever touch me

harm me

or hurt me

why do we have to craddle this pain

so real and so deep

hiding, always hidding

i wish you were here more than ever bby

i wish you loved me

because right now

i lost faith in the human kind....

congratulations for your car

makes my grieve a little lighter

to know you are doing fine

this is week 7 since you walked away

i wonder how was your week

sweet love of mine?

--------------------------sabrina-----------------

Song of the week a drop in the ocean by ron pope

A drop in the ocean A change in the weather I was praying that you and me might end up together It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the desert But I'm holding you closer than most 'cause you are my heaven

Quote of the week

Walking, working, barely breathing
My thoughts, far away
Heart aching, mind racing
Sleep does not come easily, nor last long....
~Peter Winstanley